Why my Biracial Daughter Wears Straight-Hair Wigs
Should I stop her?
Reading this comic strip, you would think my daughter is confident and comfortable with exactly who she is at all times. Well, you’d be mistaken. Alana (the name I use for her in the comics) is a nine-year-old girl who epitomizes authenticity in every area but her hair.
Gliding into the living room, almost daily, holding her karaoke microphone. Wearing the pink and purple wig her grandparents gave her for Christmas, is nine-year-old Alana. My half Japanese, half African-American daughter.
On the one hand, I know she likes wearing the wig because it’s straight and she thinks it looks better than her beautiful curly hair. On the other hand, I feel like she should take the wig off and feel good singing with her natural look.
Should I force her to take the wig off and be herself?
Of course, not. I think I should relax and let Alana pretend to be someone else for a little while. It’s the only way, at this age, she will experience her dream of having long straight hair. Besides, It’s fun.
The reality can be challenging to accept at times, though.
She’d rather have a straight look than her naturally curly mixed-ish hair.
I understand that most people are not in love with their hair and wish it could be different, but Alana really gets upset with what she’s got. And I think I know why.
Alana is the only girl on both sides of our families with mixed hair.
In fact, she’s the only one who’s biracial. My side is all African-American, and my wife’s family are all Japanese.
When Alana spends time with either side, it’s clear that she doesn’t look just like them. Of course, I know she’s unique and beautiful but, I am her father. The fact that Alana doesn’t see her self represented in our family may be making it difficult to feel connected. Now that she’s growing older, she’s noticing more and articulating her frustrations.
My wife and I want her to be proud of being a part of two races and cultures but know we can’t fully understand how she feels.
